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User blog:SWLover2/D.I.T. Literary Universe villains, ranked from weakest to strongest
Historically, the biggest problem with D.I.T., especially the D.I.T. Literary Universe, has been its villains. While many of them are mighty and powerful and filled with muscles, several certainly aren't, such as the ones featured in D. Isaac Thomas' latest release, "Diary of a Troubled Eighth Grader." In fact, the main villain isn't really even a villain. So I took a look at the primary antagonist from each book so far to give you a sense of which were the strongest (and weakest). This list doesn't include all villains in the DLU: just major ones with some very special exceptions (Willie the Banker). It also excludes Pete and Helen McKeen, who are good now and it was kind of obvious they would be eventually. 30. President Evans (The X-Children: The Return of the Verasect) The "evil President" isn't exactly an untrue stereotype but hell if it isn't a tired cliche. Evans was a bit lazily written: He's paranoid that Master Intelligence is trying to start a war and that Lindsay is helping him and will do anything to damage their reputations so he may have them sentenced to death. He's a lifeless villain with only a few lines, yet he's mentioned all the time. What he needs is a logical adviser and a treadmill. 29. Grace Tyler (Diary of a Troubled Eighth Grader) Grace Tyler wasn't a terrible villain, but she was far from evil, she's just a pain in Zachary's butt and let's face it, we're all a pain sometimes. She's an academic overachiever and took charge during Field Day, and does her work with a smile. 28. Reba Silo Walltalker (The Man Who Talked to the Wall) 27. Suzie (The Man Who Talked to the Wall 2) This girl is so forgettable I almost forgot Mr. Walltalker had more than one nemesis. D. Isaac Thomas probably fell asleep typing her lines. 26. Yidd (Journey to Planet 12) Yidd was an evil scientist who does messed-up experiments for money, but mostly for his own selfish entertainment. Annie was already about to go back home to Earth and this picture book didn't even need a villain. 25. Candy Man (The X-Children: Where Are You Now?) This character was promoted half to death, so it was disappointing that his character was so underwritten. While he had some funny moments including the Turan gag, his character felt like a rushed, last-minute addition when people realized that the main villain, Hell Burnbottom, was already the villain in the original series. Candy Man is an ideal example when we don't know who the villain is until the end so we need a holding villain until then. This guy could really use some thoughtful character development. 24. The Keeper (Journey to Planet 12 II) 23. The Dark Priest (Diary of a Troubled Seventh Grader) Who is the Dark Priest? Good question. He was a diminutive terrorist outraged by peace and the central villain in the second "Zachary Brown" book. His whole thing was subjecting his childhood school to everlasting chaos, allegedly on the orders of a sentient apple. He never gave a reason for wanting to shrink-ray thousands of underage asses except out of sheer spite. Honestly, the entire book - which warrants a six out of ten - could have been avoided if Martha was smart enough not to let Zach eat sweets without knowing where they came from, especially if they're for Jon. 22. Potty (The Prime Poppies) As the first villain in the first DLU book ever, Potty defined what these villains could and should be. His motivations, while not relatable, make sense, and he has the intelligence, resources, and talent to be believably threatening. 21. Charity Hirz (Annie and the Blue-Eared Kid) Charity Hirz wasn't a terrible villain, but she also wasn't exactly a villain at all. Like Emily Watson, she had a reasonable motivation, but was a bit more understanding and didn't murder anybody. 20. Lord Veyakon (Annie and the Blue-Eared Kid 2) All right, let's face it, this last-minute villain only exists to cause a climax with the Essama in order to help Savannah van Dukas destroy as much property as possible. 19. Longfellow (Boys vs. Girls: The Coming Darkness) Longfellow is an associate of the Girl-Team with a small brain and a large ego. Longfellow is such an entertaining villain and one of the trilogy's most memorable characters, bringing unconventional charisma to a cast of children and adolescents. 18. Mr. Baby Tutu (Superquack) 17. Minister Maggot (The Super Babies: Prequel II: The Second Hero) Minister Maggot is one of the rare villains in the DLU that has a personal vendetta against the main character's allies who doesn't feel like a desperate tie-in. The battle in 2013's "Zero to Hero" affected his livelihood: He ran a company that advocated for Squib rights. But the damage caused by the Robotic Monster, coupled with stray blasts from its fight with Baby Intelligence, caused the company to (literally) go down in flames. In their final battle, Baby Intelligence saves Minister Maggot's life. In prison, Maggot refuses to reveal anything about Baby Intelligence's pet project, proving that his arc throughout the book is worth investing in. 16. The Lord of the Stone And who is this big grey guy? Good question. He was the leader of the Kingdom of the Stone and the central villain in the first "Before The SMSB" book. His whole thing was bringing "eternal darkness" to the world, so he killed a King, shapeshifted into him, and ruled with no interest in the good of his people. The Lord of the Stone's backstory and motivation is pretty much that he likes rocky and metallic things? Thanks to Leonard and Sir Analdas, the world never went stony. Honestly, the entire book - which is fine, but forgettable - could have been avoided if somebody suggested the Lord of the Stone just move to the Rocky Mountains. 15. Zira Miranda Grover (Boys vs. Girls 2) Zira Miranda Grover is pure evil--there's not a righteous bone in her entire body. Without leaving her throne, Zira has complete control over the Earth through the International Alliance, ruling everything while keeping her bulk comfortably seated at all times. The reason she's not higher is because if you can get through the shield on her throne and the little-known turrets hidden in it, she's defenseless on her own. Tender muscles, soft belly, sedentary and heavy body, you get the picture. 14. Rotta Hecks (The Super Babies: Prequel I: Zero to Hero) We all love to hate a good villain, but the woman who brought Baby Intelligence into existence turned out to be one of the bravest heroines in the history of D.I.T. She began her literary life as "Peter Hecks'" abusive mother and a secret and high-ranking ally to Mr. Stupid NoHead, but when the Dark Lord endangered the life of her son, she ingeniously orchestrated his rise from an unwanted freak to a solar-system-famous superhero. Rotta's driven by love alone, first for her Master, then for her son, which is what makes her an endearing and engaging character. 13. L'smae (Before The SMSB: Who Will Hold Dominion?) 12. Hilary J. Black (Boys vs. Girls: The Rise of the Serpent) 11. The Lord of the North (The Super Babies: An Ended Generation) The Lord of the North was fine, but he's way too similar to Mr. Stupid NoHead and gets killed way too easily. Plus it's annoying hear him rant like he's reading lines from the Bible. We all know he's just a holdout villain for Annabeth Black. 10. Steven Thompson (Diary of a Troubled Sixth Grader) Steven Thompson isn't an outright villain here, but he made "Diary of a Troubled Sixth Grader" better and added a lot of depth to everyone in the trilogy as a whole. He's very talented and resourceful. 9. Hell Burnbottom (The Super Babies: Book III: Revenge of Hell Burnbottom) Hell Burnbottom is pure evil, just like his father, who trained him to become a vicious instrument of pure intent. He's a one-note villain, but he's terrifying and powerful and anyone who has deep feelings for Annabeth is a winner in my book. 8. Emily Watson (Boys vs. Girls: The Fate of the Towers) Emily Olsen Watson was an interesting concept. Her intentions were to save the world by balancing who was in charge of what so no one would feel the need to commit sin. Emily was fine, but her goals intentions were a stretch. The best thing about Ultron is that his origins paved the way for Stark and the heroes in the MCU to face serious consequences for their actions, starting with "Captain America: Civil War." 7. Annabeth Black (The Super Babies: Book V: The Final Chapter) Annabeth Black often holds back when fighting little kids, which is honorable, but she takes out Lindsay effortlessly when she has no other choice. 6. The Dark Flame (The X-Adults: Endgame: The Latest Threat) The Dark Flame (or Thomas Meyer) is one of fiction's best antagonists, but he also held off Master Intelligence and Baby Strength simultaneously, took out two zerads, and bested the Dark Woman, all before his reign of terror. And he sure as hell isn't scared of Nebelon, so yeah. 5. Dorphane Giles (Before The SMSB: Where is the Darkness?) Dorphane Giles was a mass-murdering tyrant whose frightening demeanor is lost in pounds of disloyalty and unfeeling cruelty. Giles is menacing and D. Isaac Thomas is a freaking expert at delivering her many, many monologues and I've actually heard him do it, but other than that there's not much characterization. I guess she's trying way too hard to be a badass. Her cruelty is such that she bathes in the blood of her victims, which admittedly is pretty badass. 4. Sebiscuits Cardarphen (The Super Babies: Prequel III: The S.M.S.B.) 3. Jamboga Pine (Superquack II) 2. Mr. Demonic NoHead (Before The SMSB: Why Has The Storm Ceased?) 1. Mr. Stupid NoHead (The Super Babies: Pride of the Super Babies) An Almataffe-wielding Dorphane Giles was no match for the Almighty Mr. Stupid NoHead. Category:Blog posts